If I were searching for a job for myself, I would not send my resume to HR and wait for a phone call, I would go through my social network contacts and call every manager who I thought might be hiring recruiters. If they did not need a recruiter, I might offer them third party staffing services.
Some people view this as improper networking etiquette, but if I need a job, I couldn’t care less about propriety.Directly connecting with the manager can put you right at the top of the pile of resumes and since you are not an agency that needs a vendors list approval from HR, all you have to do is sell yourself to the manager, meet him for lunch or something. It is sales 101 and most people have no idea how to go about it. It’s also a numbers game. The more you sell, the more likely someone will buy.
Most “career coaches” will tell you to follow up with HR, but I take it a step farther and tell you to seek out the hiring manager. HR has a reputation for being a quagmire for resumes and to give them credit they get thousands of resumes. In addition to that, not all corporate recruiters understand what the hiring managers are searching for. By calling direct you take the uncertainty right out of the equation.
Finally, most recruiters don’t care if you are about to lose your house in a foreclosure. The only person who will take care of you is interestingly enough, YOU! This is why you have to take matters into your hands and sell, sell, sell!
For strategies on how to approach your job search please call me at 1-800-791-7794.
I asked this question a while back as I was going back and thinking about the relationships that I saved and those I burned. I have to say that burning a bridge is sometimes just as useful as keeping one since without the burning a new one cannot be built…
Have you ever had to burn one bridge to build another?
I am a consultant Test Manager working on a contract basis.
Although in theory, most large IT shops involve Testing at an early stage in the SDLC, in practice Testing tends to be brought in at the last minute to test quality into the system (!?)
My job therefore is to come along late and tell everyone what they’ve done wrong - great way to make friends. Among my most successful jobs I count projects I stopped completely, a couple after more than $3 million in development. The damage to the companies concerned had the software been released whether to the bottom line or reputation would have cost more than the wasted development costs. These decisions certainly put a lot of noses out of joint.
In my job I necessarily burn bridges as part of doing my job ethically, but for every person who wouldn’t rehire or recommend me, I hope there are many more who appreciate the hard decisions I sometimes have to make.
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Unfortunately. I don’t like being put in a position where I have to.
In a technical world, its OK to fail. You are going to make mistakes. Everyone gets smarter as the team evolves.
In a political world, to Fail is a death knoll. You lose any and all credibility and power of negotiation, once you fail. Especially if you fess up. You may survive if you can stick the mistake on someone else.
I SUCK at politics. But I will not compromise my ethics. So, when I get in a position where I lack the moral flexibility to survive, I tend to look for a way out. Politics and Engineering do not mix. Once politics becomes prevalent, your team will become afraid to try new things or afraid to express new ideas.
The one lesson I’ve learned -> Once you’ve made the decision to move on -> NEVER EVER EVER SAY ANYTHING. Anything you say, you own. If you declare the problem, you own it. And all of the problems around what you own as well. It instantly becomes your fault and folks that were there seem to remember only selective things. After all, its EASY to pin something on someone whose no longer there because you can’t defend yourself if you don’t know. And others are not going to stick up for you because it puts them in the ownership seat.
So far, in a career of 30+ years and a consulting career of almost 15 years, I have not burned any bridges. As a consultant, I have always believed in the importance of leaving a happy client behind.
Sometimes this has been rather painful — I recall one situation early in my consulting practice that was particularly difficult (horrendous office politics) but I stuck with it and finished the job by re-engineering the process and eliminating my role! The manager was so appreciate that he then gave me a year-long second assignment. Then, after we had both moved on to other things, he brought me in at his new company, where I have (off and on) spent 5 years. In addition, I have leveraged experience from those assignments into several others!
If I had walked away from that assignment, burning my bridge with that particular manager, my consulting career would have been much less rewarding (in every sense!) over the past 10 years.
Finish the job if at all possible — and then (and ONLY then) move on…
Great question. To answer your question specifically, I would need a heck of a lot more information about you, the situation, the type of burning, etc.
However, in general, I would say that burning one bridge to build another is typically the result of your moving on from one person/company (a supplier, contractor, vendor, etc.) for another with more favorable terms (offering you more, cheaper, better, etc. services).
In my opinion, if you have a good relationship and history of good communication with the first (who’s bridge is about to be burned), you can explain the situation in such a way that they agree with your decision. Put the onus on them - to match the new bridge’s deal (cost, quality, reliability, etc.). If they can, good for them and good for you - no need to burn the bridge. If they can’t, you can explain to them that you hope they understand why you have to move on.
Doing this in a way that is honest, truthful and compassionate, rather than threatening them that you’ll walk if they don’t give in, makes it much harder for them to harbor resentment. Ideally, they’ll understand your predicament and hope you’ll come back when the situation is right.
Yes, ofcourse. This happens with sincere regularity in a hot market, where there is a lot of churn.
One simple thing each one of us could do is to keep our side of the bridge strong enough and to NOT to let the entire bridge collapse. One side of the bridge is sufficient, so that the other person at some point could always reconsider the option.
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I would be more likely to try to connect the bridges. I have had to burn my side of a bridge to fend off attacks. It’s sad when that happens because building bridges is a good part of what I do.
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Hi Gene,
When I was new in my profession I ended up calling on an intensely political lattice of unnamed group of people. One subgroup had a history with the rest. I separated myself to pursue business relationships with the majority who saw more patients that I could impact.
What I learned is that in an office, if they are truly anti-industry, then you should let them be-there’s probably more that meets the eye
I would have handled it differently knowing what I know now-being less naïve.
We are all professionally friendly now as bygones are bygones and everyone understands……..
In everyday life, I believe we all have to make trade-offs to align ourselves to support and be supported by those that share our values, which at the end of the day is all you’ve got. -scary if there isn’t any……
Cheers,
Sherri
Clarification added 6 months ago:
Gene, I felt obligated to communicate that it was revealed over time that there was a lot of jealousy towards the success of these individuals. Recognizing their leadership in their field, I have since referred both patients and physicians to their practice. As professionals, jealousy-in individual or lattice type is an interesting dynamic to ignore, manage, etc…
Once. Personally I tried my best to re-create it but it was only barely mended. With 20/20 hindsight I realize that it was a correct decision. I would say that you should seriously think if you are about to burn a bridge but then sometimes that is the right step to move forward. Stephanie Cadirci
Of course…I think this happens more often than not! In the event industry it really is a small world…almost borderline incestuous….everyone knows everyone and therefore everyone tends to be afraid of “burning bridges”…but recently I found that once you burn a bridge, if in fact it was a legitimate burning, others will come out of the woodwork and admit that they have burned the same bridges.
Everyone seems to “play nice” on the outside, but once it is known that you feel the same way about a company/person/etc as they do, you realize how many others out there feel the same way and burned those bridges long ago while wondering how you “played nice” for so long….
Burning bridges at times is part of doing business…some bridges are better off burnt than in tact, so as to make sure that you have no association or connection with them what-so-ever…
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I have recruited from a former client because my existing client asked that I do so. It was a very difficult decision where I avoided buring a bridge..Whenever possible, never burn a bridge..
Sometimes you stand on an edge, where you have to make a decision, which will result in a burnt bridge, but sometimes it is something you have to do to reach something you want to archive. I think the most important thing is that you can look into yourself afterward and know you made the right decisione, choice etc.
In a competitive and small market, you sometime end burning a bridge or two, but it is important you keep building other bridges ..
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My goal has always been to build bridges and not waste time burning bridges but in the business climate that we all exist in sometimes due to politics it may be necessary to burn a bridge.
The only time that I burn a bridge is when trust has been broken. Integrity and accountability is lacking to a great degree. I do not waste my time on bridges where the other party lacks accountability and more importantly integrity. Life is to short to concentrate on bridge building with folks that focus just on themselves to the detriment of the others.
In my experience, burning bridges normally comes back to haunt although we all know it is impossible to ‘never” do it.
The only time I burn a bridge on purpose is if I feel the person has done something unethical personally or in business. Once someone has burned my trust I can never go back to them. The nagging doubt always remains and I find it draining to have to consider what I can and cannot say or do around a person…
In that one case, I will burn a bridge if only to build an new one to move on.
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You never, ever know who’s going to show up on the other side of the table as manager, interviewer, client, whatever. The world seems so big when you’re burning the bridge and so small when you walk into a conference room and find the other end of that mess on the other side of the table.
The only time I’d deliberately burn a bridge is in the case of unethical behavior. Sometimes you’re force to separate yourself actively from actions or people. The rest of the time, I keep my mouth shut, smile, take everyone to lunch, and move on.
Burning Bridges? Depending on exactly how one might define it; this should almost never be necessary. Highly refined interpersonal, leadership, and management skills, together with simple old fashioned gentlemanly behavior, should negate the need to burn a well constructed bridge.
Certainly, there will be times in business, when one might need to assertively protect ones business interests; however, it should practically never be done in an aggressive, bridge burning manner.
Of the CEO’s and corporate board directors that I have known, added to the numerous executives that have written business books, it is my experience that most do not burn bridges.
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Only on the very rare occasion. I typically enjoy building bridges and keeping them in tact.
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Hello Gene,
Very rarely, unless the fire has started from the other side and I have no control over it. Even then, I bring the water.
If you can be diplomatic - you could do both. But the genuineness of the bridges would be in question.
As long as you are genuine - what you will find is that building a bridge at the expense of burning one is the easiest thing to do. And building a genuine bridge without burning the old one would be the toughest. Apologies for getting philosophical on this one…:-)
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I don’t burn bridges I had build. Never. But sometime I abandon my bridges to move on. Even when I strongly disagree with some one or with the entire business I don’t like to stand up and to declare my disagreement loudly. I just don’t touch the subject when I know I have a different position then an other person. I don’t say I silently leave when someone does something wrong from my perspective. I try to find a common ground in soft manner, but if I see I cannot find right words and right action to fix a disagreement I just leave. My point is: some people learn from their own mistakes only, they don’t like to hear about other people experience and to leave them alone on their way to the fail is the only way to teach them.
This is such a final decision that it requires very carefull consideration. In an ideal world you should never have to burn bridges to build others.
One should opt for alternatives until the last…+ 1, before ever burning a bridge. If you have to break a link to replace it with another, something must have gone really wrong. Also burning a bridge to build another sounds really like betraying or abandonning a relationship. I believe you have to be in a dire situation to act like that.
This has happened to me, over time, when I had made a wrong judgement call in building a bridge to begin with and after every effort had been made to salvage it.
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gene
i have never let go a client or a friend just so that i could be more appealing to someone else.
i have often had to decide between one and the other in business and in relationships. i have never wanted to burn any bridges and normally dumped the side that created this option or applied the preassure in the first place.
if both sides preassurised me then often i dumped both sides. an absolute waste of time trying to keep up to the demands of such people. it is a moving target really. may as well concentrate on somethinbg else. the world is a large enough place for people like myself.
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There will always be bridges that will be planned, built, maintained, strengthened, weakened, broken, burned. There are many factors that prompt these activities, both in the professional world and the personal world.
In the long run, what matters is, not how many bridges were built, or torn down, or burnt, or salvaged for another bridge, for me, it’s a matter of realizing that this is part of life in the professional world. I do my bit, making my efforts towards the maintenance and improvement of the bridge, and my efforts towards countering any factors from damaging it be it from the other side, or from external forces.
If for any reason the bridge cracks, find out why it cracked and find ways to mend it, so it doesn’t crack from there again. Sometimes, it’s inevitable that a bridge will come into disuse and eventually weaken and break. This happens to bridges which for some reason are not worth investing in their maintenance and up-keep.
Then there are the really bad cases where bridges have to be burnt to the grown and their ashes thrown away.
Bottom line, there should be a clear understanding of why a bridge broke, be it from any side, why a bridge should be burnt. Because, without this clarity of understanding, and sometimes acceptance, it can get a burden of unanswered questions.
Salman Khan also suggests this expert on this topic:
I have not burned any bridges yet in my career. I feel that at times it could be necessary to continue to move on. I think it is good not to *torch* the bridge just in case you have to cross it again in the future. Even if you build a new bridge that goes in different directions from your old bridge. You never know how the bridges could be eventually “linked” one day.
Definitely. When it comes to work - it is just what it is -business. It should not be taken too personally. If I believe I’m right in the particular situation - I’ll burn a bridge.
I thought Zale wrote an informative newletter that I should share with anyone so lucky as to visit my blog. It’s really dead on….
Two common goals LinkedIn members face everyday is (1) How to grow a LinkedIn network and (2) How to generate traffic to a website.
I have found a solution that uses leverage to solves both goals and help others at the same time.
I love leverage. I love Win-Win.
I have been writing articles on LinkedIn for my website and had some success generating traffic, but nothing really spectacular. I received lots of thanks and compliments, but I had no phenomenal growth, nor did I receive much revenue from my efforts.
I decided to do something about it and read Ken Evoy’s free e-book, The Master’s Course on Affiliate marketing which you can get here. In the course, he outlines how to create content to generate traffic. Ken’s approach is to create content that attracts traffic through the search engines. The expertise comes in how you create the content.
My web site is all about helping people achieve success at the same time I realized I had an access to 20,000,000 people through LinkedIn. The problem, was, how I do interest the 20,000,000 LinkedIn Members to come to my site? I use my LinkedIn network to help create great content and at the same time generate traffic to my site. The six steps and how to apply them is described two paragraphs away.
One approach to solve the problem is through my Success Stories group. If you are part of the group, I hope you are taking advantage of the opportunity I provide to you to market and promote your profile. If you are not part of the Success Stories group, you can join here.
The process has worked wonderfully. I have asked well over 40 questions and have received between 20 and 70 answers to each of the questions. And in have received hundreds of compliments on my questions. My direct LinkedIn network grows by over 200 people a week and my website traffic grows by 10% to 20% week over week.
Here are the six steps I follow and you can do exactly the same things based on your website topic:
I write an article on my site about some element of success. I have written about motivation, about handling failure, and positive about Positive Mental Attitude (PMA) as an example. My current source for ideas is from Napoleon Hill’s Law Of Success.
I then create a question about success that my article is focused on. The question is worded to attract as many people to contribute and read as possible. In the question, I post a very short summary of my article, since the focus is on other people’s answers. Sometimes, I don’t even give my own answer.
After posting the answer, I sometimes select people from my LinkedIn network who based on their area of expertise might have something to add. This step is based on the question and its focus. LinkedIn creates an e-mail based on the question. I modify it a bit to make it personal. I also add to the e-mail, a reminder that LinkedIn Answers is a great opportunity to promote them selves and their profile.
I then send a special e-mail to each member of my Success Stories group a link to the question and remind them how to promote themselves in answering the question. In the e-mail, I add links to previously posted Success Stories.
After the question is expired, I take the answers, edit them so the answers and consistent in format, add some personal comments or responses as appropriate and then post them at my site. I am sure to include the link to the profile and any websites they have included. (In earlier versions, I missed this step)
Through LinkedIn, I send a thank you note to all the people who have responded and include a Link to the success story on my website.
What’s in it for all the people who have responded to my question?
For the people who have taken the time to answer the question, they have had several ways to promote themselves and have had a chance to share their answers. The promotion is on LinkedIn, its on their profile, and its on my site.
Everybody who reads the answers to the questions will read some of their thoughts and the answer may create new possibilities.
Google spiders LinkedIn Answers, so their answer, their profile link, and their website link has become available.
Google spiders my site as well. This means the answers and all the links are included in Google. I am surprised at the number of people who come and spend time on my site because of a person’s name that was included in the LinkedIn Answer. (I see it through Google analytics)
I have touched all the people who have answered my Success question through the thank you and have given them a very personal reason to visit my website. They love seeing their name and link on other peoples sites, I do, don’t you?
What’s In It For Me? (It does take a lot of time - so the payback has to be strong):
I have given everybody in my LinkedIn network an opportunity to promote themselves in a very special and unique way.
The volume of questions each of us receives on LinkedIn, means that very few people actually are able to take advantage of answering questions. And their answers, no matter how good are just lost in the either.
I have given special notice to people in my network who have requested it and those people who have taken the time to join my Success Group a special opportunity to promote themselves.
I have content on my site that is relevant and interesting. It inspires my readers, it drives traffic, and it generates links from Google, Yahoo, and Ask. And even once in a while StumbleUpon.
Other people with Blogs who answer my questions add a link to their answer and to my blog.
No matter what your expertise is. You can follow the same techniques as this to
a) Attract traffic to your website
b) Grow your LinkedIn network.
It’s called Swipe and Deploy. Swipe my technique and deploy it with your expertise.
P.S. If you want to grow your network, then you need to make sure that you are making great use of LinkedIn Groups. You can read an article at are how to use LinkedIn Groups to grow your network and some of the groups I have created to help connect people who want to achieve success in their life. You can find the article at http://www.zaletabakman.ca/2007/12/20/5-ways-to-use-linkedin-groups-effectively/
P.P.S. Make sure you are part of my Success Stories group. I described the technique above. Join the group and post an answer and links to your site and your company. It’s a great way of letting the world know all about you. You can join the group at http://www.linkedin.com/e/gis/44441/6D2CAC1C623D.
P.P.P.S. As a member of the Networking For Success group, you are part of Zale’s Inner Circle and have some special privileges. I have some hidden pages which are only available to member’s of my inner circle. You can find the privileges of the Inner Circle here. There is a limited access group called Zale’s Inner Circle. By receiving this e-letter you have been pre-approved for it, but are not a member. Access to The Inner Circle is only available through an e-letter sent by me. The only way to find the link is to read this P.S. therefore, the members of the Inner Circle are special, and they are people who are careful and want to be successful. People who are not intent on being successful probably won’t read this P.S. and won’t find out about the group. Joining the Inner Circle group means you want to be successful and are willing to put in the effort and want to mean similar people. To join this special group on LinkedIn, click here.
P.P.P.P.S. This e-mail only goes to people who has joined the Networking For Success Group. I have assumed that you wanted to develop a business relationship, but did not want to be SPAMMED or sold anything. Therefore, any e-mails I send you will only contain information and knowledge that is free and usable as is. It will never contain any solicitation nor is your e-mail given away or sold. However, I understand if you do not wish to receive any e-mails from me. You can stop receiving these e-mails by clicking here.
P.P.P.P.P.S. I hope you are currently connected to me. If you are, I have added at least 1,500,000 connections to your network and thousands more each day. If we are not connected since I am long out of invitations, so you will need to send me one. You can check if we are connected on my profile at www.LinkedIn.com/in/ZaleTabakman. If we are not connected, send an invite to Zale@ZaleTabakman.ca and use the friend link!
